Taylor and Aliyanarah ("you're so golden")

8/25/2023

More often than not there’s hurt, shame, heartbreak, divorce, suffering, poverty, illness. More often than not the world can seem cruel. Divorce rates are up to 50%, our coral reefs are dying, and everyday is hotter than the last. There’s unlimited access to news and mortifying hashtags on a daily basis. The world is in dire need of healing.

But this piece isn’t about that. Sometimes, sometimes, on rare occasions there’s a sort of synchronicity, a cohesiveness that makes it all okay. Something that makes life worth living. 

I’m not God, I can’t tell you what it all means. But I can tell you sometimes it aligns. Too perfect to be true, it can feel scripted. Like that one night a couple weeks ago, I was talking to God. I told em to send me a sign. Later that night I saw a shooting star and I knew that was my sign. I’m not sure what pushed me to look at the sky at that exact nanosecond. I’m not sure why there, why now, and why a shooting star? But I was there and it was magical. I knew it was a real sign because my body felt electrocuted with joy, as if the star went through me and shared its brightness. 

That whole night was a buzz.  

One thing leads to another and another and another, and one single decision can change everything. Words unspoken, actions not taken, time not awakened. Everything affects everything and we are all so much more interconnected than we think.

This is why I find the union of people fascinating. More specifically the union of my friends: Taylor and Aliyanarah. I’m sure before they met they had no idea of each other. I’m sure if you asked them two years ago how much their lives will intertwine they wouldn’t believe it. It all feels so perfect the way they found each other. Taylor on his last step of a dead end road. Aliyanarah down the same avenue. One door closed, and then a gate opened. Their union brings me such immense happiness. Aliyanarah has the kindest spirit and a perfect smile. Taylor is simply a breath of fresh air. He’s the smell of your clean sunday laundry. 

I have to admit, I hardly believe love exists nowadays. The more the belief withers, the more I feel like I'm losing a part of me. Maybe it’s the way I was told there was more in the world, but I didn’t want the world I wanted you. Maybe it’s all the empty cups I’ve filled. Maybe it’s the way my entire family is broken now, after having beautiful brown eyed kids, after a house together, after building a life. Some things I can’t believe. But I know at the core of me, this isn’t who I am. And I know at the core of me I believe in true, passionate, committed love. A love so true, a love that stays, and grows old with you. A love I can jump into and I know I will be safely caught.

I won’t blame it on a generation, that’s too vague, too much of a cop out for me. But I will say I witness people lying to each other. Giving each other false confidence. Sometimes you’re not a bad bitch for leaving. Sometimes you have unresolved issues to face and you resort to running away. You’re a sad bitch. That’s something your friends won’t tell you. We give up too easily. A problem arises and we run. I guess what I'm saying is we need to hold ourselves more accountable. This is terribly targeted to me as well. 

And so I find it incredible, when I witness people my age willing to give themselves to each other with full trust. Taylor and Aliyanarah love each other, this I know, it’s something I can feel. Sometimes I feel like their relationship was also put into MY life so I don’t lose myself, I don’t lose hope. But that also sounds selfish. And that’s the thing about love, it doesn’t just bless the people in it but the people around them too. It ties, it heals, it’s a fire and you're a bystander wrapped up in warmth. 

Don’t give up, things really don’t come easy, sometimes your one chance is your last, love is a privilege, take very good care of it. You may never get the chance again. 

And to Taylor and Aliyanarah, I hope one day I can read this script at your wedding (if that’s the path you guys choose). From the bottom of my heart, I wish you guys the absolute best. For now, me and my hopeless friends will go to the bars and talk about how much we admire and love you guys. Maybe one day my kids and your kids will be best friends with my kids by default and we’ll see each other every sunday to have a delicious shared meal, and definitely some wine. 

Until it’s our turn to experience something so true, we will live vicariously through you.

-Suazo